A Total Chess Immersion Unit.
The TCIU is a sound-proof pod with indirect lighting. Inside is a comfy leather captain’s chair, a DGT electronic sensor chessboard with a beautiful custom carved Staunton set, multiple video screens with an extensive instructional DVD library, and redundant high-speed Internet connections for ICC.
The unit features a Dolby surround sound stereo system to crank Era Vulgaris or Ride of the Valkeries or whatever.
And it sits on an industrial shake table – the kind they use to test satellites to make sure they can withstand launch vibrations. When you slam down your bishop and deliver check, KABLAM, the DGT board gives a signal and the whole unit quakes like San Francisco.
Tim Newman and I cooked this up years ago. Now I really want one.
I think this is available at the House of Staunton for $6999. Actually, that might be the price for just one of their sets — I think I am just confused from the daily ads they have been sending me.
Awesome idea! That, of course, is not in many people’s budgets.
the DGT board gives a signal and the whole unit quakes like San Francisco.
LOL! For some reason, the phrase “The NBA Jam of Chess” comes to mind. (the old 2 vs 2 craziness version)
Chess Jam: Fast moving, only 3 sec to make a move, or you lose it. Power-ups randomly pop-up on the squares; land a piece on a square with the “N3″ power-up, and that piece gets to move like a Knight for the next 3 turns… Bishops raining 3-pointers down the diagonals…
Or maybe not.
You can all pitch in for me. :)
@LEP: He’s heating up! haha, or on a particularly nasty fork: Boomshakalaka!!
Maybe we invent the Chess Jam video game, and then use the proceeds to finance this other project. It’s really too bad that there’s no market for a TCIU or else maybe someone would actually invent it.
this is exactly the sort of reason that i love to read your blog, the way a sports nut reads espn or sports illustrated or si or whatever. i dont want to be out of the loop on what is important. :)
DK – a most generous characterization :)
@drunknknite: But there is a market for it. And his name is Derek Slater.
@Derek: It does feel strange to refer to you in third person on your own blog.
And yes, I’ve been laughing for the past 12 hours envisioning someone slamming down a Knight and shouting “Boomshakalaka!”
It would also have a retinal scan bio-lock option to only allow “authorized” people only ( not wife and kids).
“Dad’s in his pod again.”
I guess it is sort of a Man-Cave for the terminally geeky.
I keep envisioning the room under the bed in the RV in Meet the Fockers…
There is no doubt that if I had a TCIU in my house it would be known to others in said house as the “Dork Pod” and there would be no need whatsoever to install a restricted-access system. That would shave at least a few dollars off the retail price, anyway. ;)
dammit! what a great idea!!!!
As Will Smith remarked in that torrid Independence Day movie,”I HAVE GOT TO GET ME ONE OF THESE!”
Rushing the prototype to market now, in response to overwhelming demand.
I want a mobile version of it to take to tournaments. That way I can keep all the noise from the tournament room out, and be in ultimate comfort. I guess it would have to be a little bigger to allow my opponent to sit in there with me. I wouldn’t want to have leave to give him the moves. :-)
Maybe we just strap a big display monitor to the outside so he can see your moves without invading your space.
Too many smelly chessplayers. I’m not manufacturing a two-seater. :)