Trash talk

Reassembler regular Greg K and I are paired next Tuesday at the Metrowest Chess Club. On Board One. USATE grudge match. Serious clash of the titans.

(p.s. many thanks to Igor, Denys, Vigorito etc for not showing up so we can sit there for one week.)

Obviously I’m going to kick Greg’s butt, and by ‘obviously’ I refer to the fact that he’s significantly higher rated, more talented (he was a youth star in spite of the fact that he didn’t like chess), more intuitive, taller, working in a more lucrative profession, living in a nicer town, etc.

Okay. The truth of the matter is I don’t get trash talk. In spite of its high standing in society today. Seems to me that when two sports fans start jawing before a game about how their team is going to whoop the other team, AT LEAST one of the two fans is guaranteed to end up looking like an idiot. (Unless it’s a sport that allows ties. But what kind of sport would that be?) But see, that’s partly because I’m sadly literal and so to me when you say “we’re #1!”, that’s an empirical claim that can verified or refuted. I don’t get chanting “we’re #1!” when you’re #27.

Anyhoo after my best attempt at trash talk before a chess game, I’m the one who looked like an idiot (’cause I didn’t show up.) So aside from saying obviously (and by ‘obviously’…) I’m going to kill Greg, I think I’ll leave the trash talk to somebody else.

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19 thoughts on “Trash talk

  1. Oops…I must’ve missed my cue. :)

    While it is certainly true that I am taller than you, I question the accuracy of the rest of your “trash talk”. Perhaps you are trying to inflate my ego to lull me into a false sense of over-confidence?

    Well, it won’t work. I know enough to know that you hold all the cards because you know I will play 1. e4 but I haven’t a clue what you will play (1…Nf6 with your improved line against the exd6 exchange? 1…e5 in the classical spirit? 1…e6 for old times’ sake?) I like your chances.

    So you won’t hear any trash talk from me. But in the interest of full disclosure, I don’t have a sitter yet for my daughter on Tuesday night. So while I hope to remedy that situation shortly, it is quite possible that our “grudge match” will be deferred until another day.

  2. Re: Matt – he’s kind of a button-pusher, yes.

    Re: Openings – Choosing between the French and the Alekhine is like trying to decide which thumb you want cut off.

  3. So anyway, there you have it: A disgusting display from two of the world’s worst trash-talkers.

    “no, I think you’ll win.”
    “no, I think *you’ll* win.”

    They’ll never let us on the air on WEEI, that’s for sure. :)

  4. It’s kind of like a “hypermodern” approach to trash talking. Allowing the other to feel better about themselves into a sense of false security. Genius… simply genious… I am witnessing the Nimzovitch and Reti of trash talking.

  5. This is such high brow trash talk. I hang around too many kids who have trash talking down to a science. We do want to know who one thsi epic battle.

  6. This just in… Reassembler defeats Greg K. with black in a French defense!

    Full update, with analysis by Kasparov, coming soon to Chessbase.com…

  7. “… and u12?”

    Just kidding.

    Though it turned into bullet because we each spent an hour on the first 15 moves. In retrospect the moves I spent all that time on were Bd7, a6, Qc7 and Rae8 – not exactly rocket science in the French. (But Greg was threatening to detonate something on h7 every move.)

  8. I hate that… you spend 45 minutes on a move only to play something obvious that you thought of instantly when your turn started.

    It took me about 20 minutes to play h4 against the Dragon last night… duh.

  9. Hm, yeah, maybe some kind of kingside attack in the dragon. Interesting idea! :)

    I stopped castling left in the dragon a long time ago after dying several ugly deaths over there.

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