How to kill a porcupine

If you’re a fisher, i.e. a North American Marten, i.e. a mustelid relative of the weasel (and the mink and the ermine and the stoat and other cute animals) – you hop over the porcupine a whole bunch of times, causing it to spin around again and again until it becomes woozy. Then you claw its face until it bleeds out. Then you flip it over and eat it. (Not so cute after all.)

Curiously, fishers don’t eat fish.

6 Responses to “How to kill a porcupine”

  1. 1 chessloser July 9, 2008 at 9:40 am

    sounds like the description of a woman. cute and non-threatening, but she confuses you, then claws you, bleeds you out, then rips out your guts….

  2. 2 Derek Slater July 9, 2008 at 10:20 am

    A country song in the making. “You Were the Fisher Cat (and My Quills Let Me Down)”

    (I haven’t heard the song and don’t plan to, but Brad Paisley’s “I’d Like to Check You for Ticks” is a hilarious title.)

  3. 3 Wahrheit July 9, 2008 at 2:22 pm

    Fishers are the meanest, most vicious little buggers in the world (except for wolverines, perhaps). I think their attitude is precisely the one needed during a tournament chess game.

  4. 4 Derek Slater July 10, 2008 at 7:38 am

    Nice – I’ll try to envision myself as cute, furry and mean.

    *closes eyes and meditates*

    Wait – I keep getting this picture!

  5. 5 blunderprone July 11, 2008 at 1:14 pm

    I’ve got the furry part down! I have to work on the mean part… cuteness is a LONG way off… but overall i could adapt to this type of “fisher” style of chess… since I can’t play like BF.

  1. 1 Search me « Reassembler Trackback on April 8, 2010 at 10:29 pm

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